When I Went To An Indian Wedding | Funny Life Situation | Indian Wrines

Going to an Indian Wedding

Hi. I know you are here because of the title. Sorry, that was a bait. Nothing related to marriage or any thing. Hello guys, today I will be telling you how to get a Government job......... Okay- okay. I am kidding, you are at the right place, at the right spot. So feel happy and since you are so happy please do subscribe the blog so that you can get notifications whenever I post again. At least subscribe to get happy.

Sooooo, in an Indian middle class family, you are informed a month ago. About what? About the marriage that is going to happen the next month, or maybe a marriage that will be happening next year. This is nothing, I have seen an uncle talking about his son's marriage with his friend. His son was 5 years old. He didn't even know the concept of bathroom and his marriage talks were happening. Do you wonder what was his dad actually talking about. Nothing much, he was just inviting his friend in his son's future happening marriage. You understand the point I am trying to make here? I mean his son is 5 and he may marry around 28-30 until and unless he is from Rajasthan, and his marriage invitations have already been given.
Treats of living here.

So, I was told too by my mom that we are going in a marriage the next month. Trust me that was happiest thing I have heard from my mother's mouth in ages. See, I rarely have contacts, my parents rarely have contacts so obviously there are rarely people who call us in marriage functions. It is like 1 in two years.
You realise how desperate we are to go in these marriage functions. Why? Of course dude, Free Food. What else you expect. Even Bridegroom's father, in the marriage, was arguing with the Tikki wala bhaiya, why, because he, the dad, wanted more chutney. The pandit was calling him for his son's marriage ceremony but no, chutney on tikki was his priority.

So I will just skip the month and will directly take you on the marriage day. Obviously even you are not excited to know what I did in the month. It was just as boring as yours. The ony difference was, I day dreamt about going to marriage and having that free food. Like I had the same excitement level as a boy has when he is going to meet his long-distance girlfriend. 'Both Hungry'.

So finally when we reached the marriage hall things got little awkward. How? We had a question. Who enters first? It was my mother's friend's daughter's wedding. So techinically my mother should enter first. But no, my mother doesn't like that woman so she is dfinitely not going first. So obviously I had to enter first because insults and awkward department is handdled by me. This wasn't a mutual decision we took in the car. We did a competition. While we walked from our car to the hall so obviously the one who reaches first, entered first. Therefore, we all started walking slowly. So slow, that tortise got shy. At one point, competetion got so tough because we stopped walking and we all were standing in the middle of the road. Cars honking people shouting. We thought they were cheering. But obviously no. So I lost the competetion and enetered first.

So yea I led the gang, my family. As we entered a group of people came to greet us. We faked a smile like how much we care to which they faked a smile and showed how happy they were because we attended the wedding. And the Fake time ended with, "Okay, you all sit and have something". Like yea I know. That is the only reason we are here to sit, chill and eat. Meeting you all in between was an accident.

While we were sitting and eating, my mom looked a little dissatisfied. I tried to be a good son and asked her what happen. Later I realised I did the biggest mistake. Why? My mom said she is not enjoying because the snacks she wants are not served to her. I said you may wait, waiters will come. My mom lost her patience and started believing I am the waiter. So, I was ordered to bring up her desired snacks. Now you all have seen kids following these waiter and getting thier snacks from them. They are kids, they can do that. BUT, imagine a 21 year old, almost 6 foot height guy running behind those waiters to get those damn snacks. My competitor were those 5 year old kids whose marriage's invitations were being distributed probably.

Competition is waste, so I decided to collaborate with them. Being the oldest of all and having more sense then them, obviously I was supposed to follow what they say. Our leader who was in 1st class decided to form a web around these waiters. So that whenever these waiters come, all the members will be informed and we have to loot. Do you realise the seriosness we all had thier. I felt like a RAW agent with those guys.
Now, when it comes to informing others that a waiter is coming, we had no walkie-talkie, so obviously we were shouting each other's name from the corners. Now again, kids can do that because they are kids BUT imagine a 21 year old, almost 6 foot guy doing that too. People were unimpressed. Girls there, were beautiful, but they were unimpressed and felt how uncultured I am. Now see, I know what you are thinking. I could have left the gang and go impress the beautiful girls. BUT first, I am a loyal person and second, I live in Delhi. When I get out of home, I see beautiful girls roaming in dozens, alright! So impressing thing can be done outside too. BUT, I dont see free food in Delhi, therefore I set my priorities and obviously it was free food over anything.

One kid in our gang taught me a precious lesson, which I will never forget. He went to  a waiter to get some snacks, waiter gave him but then my lil friend started acting as if he had to get more snacks for someone else too and the waiter gave him more. WOAH!! That was the thing. No schools or colleges will teach you that. I thought I should try that too. I approached a waiter but being a 21 year old STUDENT, I had dead expressions on my face. And then what! The waiter ignored me and left. I have to practice this. Call me in your marriages guys.

I got really indulged with those kids. I started behaving like them. It was time to go. My parents called me that, "Hey! We are leaving. Come." To this we all started crying. I didn't want to leave, they didn't want me to leave either. So we cried and shouted as if someone died. My mom, pulling me back was an heart breaking scene to watch. Now again, kids doing that is normal, BUT imagine a 21 year old, almost 6 foot guy doing that.

Like we did a Bidai ceremony tutorials there. Bride and her mother were taking notes on how to cry from our performance. Bridegroom's father, still arguing but this time with Pao Bhaji wale bhaiya to put an extra pao and more butter.

I cried the whole journey back to home. Next morning, a slap of work pressure brought me back to reality. *Sighs* Fun night it was.

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